Is it wrong to like this pain?

[Alexandre]

You know.........life sometimes seems so hard.....
iv past the cemetery gates a few too many times
and the same nightmares have tortured my mind
over and over again

but through all the tears
my twisted pleasure lies
is it wrong to like this pain
am i as crazy as people say

i don't want to be happy
i search for reasons to linger on my pain
and yet i can find no reason why
i want to feel like this again

faces dull in my mind
are made sharp with tears
and sorrows long past buried
bring around new fears

is it wrong to enjoy the hurt
have i truly lost my mind
how the fuck do i live this way
why am i so blind

i still don't understand
and i fear i never will
i just don't want to forget
so i can hate you still

the hurt inside is provoking me
it taunts me in such a way
daring me to bleed again
it will never go away

am i crazy
i can not tell
boarding up my windows
hiding in my shell

people seem to scare me
how is it you make me feel so weak
crowds are overwhelming
i hang my head and can not speak

So I sit in the padded cells
iv created in my head
and hide from all the voices
daringly it said:

"Do you want to live like this?
Do you want to cry?
Do you want to feel like this?
Do you want to die?

Bring your fears into reality
let them swim in this pain
go ahead and run away,
you know I will be here again!"